Please welcome our newest writer, Rachel Foxwell!
Rachel is a writer and full-time marketer who is passionate about teaching millennials about money management. Rachel graduated college with $28,000 of student loans, which she is working furiously to pay off.
To document her journey in finding financial freedom, Rachel created The Latte Budget, a personal finance blog.
Do you say yes to every event your friends invite you to?
Have you gone on trips you can’t afford because you didn’t want to miss out?
Would you change your priorities immediately if you were invited to something that night?
Fear of missing out is real and it can be costly. Time to socialize is important, but it isn’t always cheap.
What contributes to added fear of missing out?
Fear of missing out (FOMO) is becoming increasingly common for many reasons. One is the growing dependency on social media. The more connected you are, the more likely you experience fear of missing out.
On social media, people broadcast the highlights of their life, making your daily life seem pale in comparison.
Comparison can quickly lead to low confidence and self-esteem. Often, we continue to spend even more money when we feel badly about ourselves. So how do we win?
How does fear of missing out cost you?
Fear of missing out costs you in more ways than one. The first may seem obvious – FOMO affects your finances.
More often than not, when you say yes to something, you are committing yourself to spending some money. Even if you allocate money for social expenses, impulsively giving into fear of missing out can quickly eat up your budget.
Another cost of FOMO is time. If you’re succumbing to every social invite extended to you, chances are your schedule is pretty full. What else could you be doing with your time? It might require you to take an honest look at yourself and your priorities.
Lastly, fear of missing out costs you your confidence. What would it look like to say yes to invitations because you truly want to go instead of committing because you’re afraid of missing out? It takes confidence to say no to the things you really don’t want to do or that don’t help you meet your goals.
How to combat FOMO
The best way to lessen the cost of FOMO is to set a budget. Find whatever budgeting technique works for you and practice it. The joy of having a budget is that you actually have money designated to social outings. You will appreciate going out so much more when you limit it according to what your budget allows.
Figure out how to socialize for less. Get creative and come up with more affordable ways to socialize. Chances are your friends could stand to save some money, too. Game nights, potlucks, and happy hours are all cheaper ways to have fun with friends.
Instead of spending all your free time just hanging out with friends, why not join an organization that matters? Whether it’s a charity, networking group, or activist club, joining an organization that means something to you will allow you to have social time while still investing in yourself and giving back.
Lastly, set long-term goals. Are you thinking about going to graduate school? Buying a house? Paying off debt? For me, the desire to achieve my goals (like blogging) is what gets me up in the morning. Though I love to socialize with my friends, my goals are more important than finding someone to hang out with every day.
If you are lacking drive, it may be because you don’t have a goal or direction, which could be the reason why you are so afraid to miss out. Do some soul-searching and find your why.
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Fear of missing out happens to all of us, but it’s something we should be aware of so we aren’t living compulsively. Time and money both are too important to spend out of fear.
Does FOMO come up frequently in your life? How do you personally work to fight it?
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Congrats on getting the writer role Rachel.
You’re right, FOMO can be very dangerous. I’m lucky that I work in a very small office where there isn’t really any expectation of going out to lunch, dinner, events or whatever. I don’t really have many friends either lol. So that kind of makes things easier..Why not just hang out at a park or the beach instead of spending money?
Tristan
Thank you, Tristan! And you’re right…ever since I started blogging, I use my lunch breaks to work on writing, so there is less temptation.
Our biggest recent struggle with FOMO was having a child. All of a sudden we found ourselves trying to do activities that would not be able to do (or enjoy doing) by having to push a stroller or coordinate around naptimes, etc.
I do recommend taking a “Babymoon” getaway even if it’s only one night.
*As our child is 14 months old, our FOMO challenge now is enjoying our time with time & letting them enjoy childhood without our whole schedule revolving around extracurricular activities like traveling sports.
Great points. I don’t have children but my puppy for awhile really proved a challenge! We had to stay home a lot while he was young and full of energy. Not quite the same as a child, but I see your point :) B
I usually say no to social events because my coworkers almost always does something every day. I want to spend money going out maybe 2 times a week, 3 times max. I don’t think I have a fear of missing out but I do have a fear of not being invited to any events in the future. My finances will be completely fine but I’m not sure how it’ll turn out. Only time can tell!
Absolutely true, when I hadn’t a budget I’ve spent money on stupid stuff and say yes to every invite, then during first month of my budgeting my social life became zero so I’ve started to alk clearly with friends saying what Ican and cannot afford and true firends keep on my side and hlped(and still helping) other disappeared…I found a good balance between social life and budget because is possible have a good social life also if you are on a budget!!!
Awesome post, Rachel! FOMO can be a huge budget buster (among other things). I’ve often found that social media posts are sensationalized or exaggerated so comparing yourself to your social media friends is pointless.
I completely agree that socializing and developing your (real) friendships is important. Budgeting for these (like you mentioned) is one of the best ways to do this. Setting aside money for going out with friends and then stretching that money out across a month will allow for some fun and not kill your budget. Even a simple phone call to chat is great! And it’s free! ;)
Love it! Thanks for sharing!
Well said. This FOMO thing is really driven by social media. Families and individuals feel they must have and be a part of all that their peers are doing. It’s important to spend according to your values instead of following the crowd. Getting caught in this trap can sidetrack folks’ finances in a major way.
“If you are lacking drive, it may be because you don’t have a goal or direction, which could be the reason why you are so afraid to miss out.” Wow! This touches upon a message that I have received 3 times in 2 days from unrelated sources (I pay attention when that happens!): the importance of purpose. I think you’ve hit the nail on the head. When someone lacks inner purpose, it’s tempting to see that fulfillment “out there” – and saying “No” becomes a risk of missing out on whatever it is that social outings don’t offer anyway.